December 31st:  Yes, i know.  It's been forever.  But, its 10:20pm new years
eve and i am at work.  So i have a right to bitch and complain as much
as I want.  And what to bitch about........... lets see.  Let's begin with
well hell.  I dont know what to bitch about.....yet.   Well, I guess it 
wouldn't be right if i didn't do a new years eve theme.  Let's take 
the people who keep bitching about it "Not being the real millenium".
I cant stand the "ACTUALLY... the millenium is 2001" or "If we based it
on jesus, he was born circa 3 BC" etc etc etc.  Damnit.. just go out,
get drunk, get laid, and have a good time.  Stop bitching.  YOU dont have
to sit at work all night and not have any fun at all.  Me, on the other
hand, someone who is reputable for having some of the biggest and best
new years eve parties around, is totally screwed.  I have been planning
tonight since i was a kid, i turn 21 Dec. 18th, 1999, and then that
new years was going to be amazing!  But noooooooo, i get to, instead,
have nothing to do at all.  I'm not even getting any calls, ive been
here an hour and a half, my phone rang once and they hungup immediately.
Though, i'm ok with not getting calls.. if someone was really calling in
for tech support tonight.. i really wonder what i'll do if i get a real
call.  most likely be condescending as hell (more than usual at least)
I wish that people would spend tonight doing SOMETHING fun.. this is the
only real landmark date-wise for our lifetimes.  Why the hell would you
spend it on the internet, or worse?  Damn.  I just know people are going
to do it too... be complete wastes of space and not do anything interesting
period.  *sigh*  I guess that can't be stopped.  But do it for me.  I'm
not having any fun.  Please.....

May 29th:  Ok, here's a little gripe about caffeine.  Ever notice
those mornings where you can drink like two or three mountain
dews before work and still be groggy as hell?  (substitute coffee
and pepsi in there at will)  I mean, i pop in a few nodoz and
some soda on the way tow ork, and it doesnt stop that cement
truck with the REALLY fat guy driving it from parking on my brain
until lunch.  But NOOOoooo.. drink an innocent 3 mountain dews
half an hour before bedtime and can you go to sleep?  Noooooo,
that would be against the 'laws of caffeine' wouldnt it?  Damn you
to hell, caffeine gods!  Cant you play fair for just once?? I
want to sleep!

May 28th:  You know, something recently has really been getting
on my nerves.  People who decide to "not like something" because
other people like it.  Some people may brand me for that, but i
can back everything up that i think sucks, because most likely
it does.  But people who say "I hate Led Zeppelin"  why?  "Because
Tommy said they suck".  Or people who hate Episode I because 
everyone else liked it.  I dont freaking get it, i mean, i am
bitter as hell, usually, and i can actually like something other
people like.  But im sure everyone has a person in their lives 
who hates some things just because other people like it, and no
other reason.  Argh.  Damnit.

May 27th:  Well, i am back from vacation! and what a vacation it
was!  Ive seen star wars: Episode I a whole 4 times, and i plan
on seeing it at least 3 times more.  Well, today's gripe is about
posters.  Posters just dont ever unroll right.. they are always
creased funny and i always seem to rip them by accident.. such
as my good old Alicia Silverstone poster... for those of you who
went to one of my rooms i had it up in.... I mean, tape is just
not a poster-hanging utility.  And tacks always mar up both the
wall, and the poster.  And frames are soooooo expensive.  Plus,
after you put it up somewhere, I hope you dont move.  Because in
the taking down, rolling, and transporting, let me tell you.  That
poster isnt going to come out crystal clean.  I need to stop 
moving... or stop buying posters....

May 14th:  Drive Thru Fun Part III!  Well, it was a taco bell day
today.  They have these new star wars drink tops that cost like
3 bucks.  It looked kinda cool, so i asked the guy if he had the
"DARTH MAUL" ones like 3 times.  he said yes.  So i pay the money,
get up there, and what does he hand me?  This suckyass little
anakin one (after AT LEAST 15 minutes of waiting).  So im like 'uh,
no' and so he's like 'try pizza hut, i hear they might have some
more' and im like 'uh, no.  gimme the darth maul one'.  'we dont
have any' Well, i was late to get back, so instead of waiting like
FOREVER for him to figure out how to give me back my three bucks,
i begrudgingly took it and left.  But damnit, im pissed.  Oh well,
maybe one day......

May 13th:  R2D2 Gigapet.  I got this R2D2 gigapet thing, and i guess
the idea of it was cool.  I mean, zekk's rancor was rather neat,
for a little while.  But this thing.. all you have to do is auto
program it to do everything for itself.  You dont 'feed' it, it
powers itself.  It doesnt have ANY games.  it just.. well... sucks.
I mean, honestly, i didnt touch the thing but maybe twice for 3
months and it was still alive.  and when it finally died, i still
got the top rating, not having to actually DO anything.  I guess
its what i get for getting a gigapet type thing.. but damnit... i
really wanted something fun...

May 12th:  Watches.  Here's the deal with watches:  Its almost 
impossible to find a watch that you can wear everywhere, basically
not worry too much about it, but that it will hold together.  I
have this $15 watch, that i guess its ok, but i swear the band
breaks all the freaking time.  The good quality watches with good
bands i wouldnt want to wear around for fear of breaking it (makes
me wonder why i have it then)  But i swear this stupid plasticy
watch breaks all the time... And the bands made out of that cloth
like material.. well those are always fraying and breaking too.
And watch LIGHTS.. thankfully the 'indiglo' type thing is common
now, because there was nothing more frusterating than pressing that
VERY VERY hard to even push in button (without busting your thumb
nail) only to see if it was AM or PM, because the light was in like
the little corner and didnt actually give off any real light.

May 11th:  Lets talk a bit about altoids.  I remember when altoids
were these really cool breath minty things.  Well, i GUESS they
still are, but for some reason whenever i have an altoid, it
seems like the 'effects' last for a few seconds, and then bam,
thats about it.  I mean, i guess if you really like mints, then
they are good, but you need to take like 5 to get any sort of
a lasting mintyness... I used to have this spray, that when you
sprayed it on your skin, it was like when you breathe in after
munching an altoid... honestly.  It was some weird anti itch
spray that made it like your leg was breathing in icyness.  It
was crazy.

May 10th:  The whole group of impulse items in a grocery store
is really just going too far.  Ok, you have your candy, and
(shudder) gum.. you've got some magazines, cigarettes, but i
think the "Babe: Pig in the City" tapes are going a bit too far.
Its almost impossible to try to buy something without knocking
one of their damn promotional items over, or at least looking at
them long enough that you get sick at yourself for considering
to buy the little 'archie' comics.  Speaking of archie comics,
does anyone ever actually READ them?  They seem to be a part of
american culture, but i dont know ANYONE who has ever really read

May 9th:  Whoops, forgot to update for awhile.  Its been a long
week.  a LONG week.  Ever wonder when they can make fountain 
drink cups that dont sweat?  I mean, theres nothing like having
a nice cool pepsi, and then having to wipe up puddles from it
every minute or two.  I mean, it cant be THAT hard to create
a cup with enough insulation that it doesnt condense on the
outside.. but then again, i guess its all part of the 'we can
do it for a lot less, so fuck you' mentality.

May 8th:  Now, i know we've gone over the drive thru thing a bunch
recently, but this just has to be told.  It was like 2am or so and
we went to the Taco Cabana drive thru.  We had to repeat our order
AT LEAST 5 times to this guy taking it.. and then he didnt even 
give us all the right stuff... not by far.  We sat there for an
entire 15 minutes waiting on the food.. if not longer.  We could
almost have gone to a real restaurant in that ammount of time..
I mean, damn... The guy i swear was drunk... He kept laughing when
we were ordering food.. like it was hilarious to order a taco
platter.  Anyway, basically, i decided that Taco Cabana is not
on my favorite food places list.  I ordered this huge meal thing
and ended up getting a burrito.  

May 7th:  I was at Wal-Mart for a mothers day gift tonight..
they had two registers.  One where a bunch of people were standing
there and some person had like some fucking palm trees or something
and "something was amiss"  so i got in the other line.  Right as
some woman buying $400 of random shit was getting there.  I had
a freaking card.  So, i sit there for 20 minutes while the register
lady with the broken arm tries to one handed scan each small item
and stick it in a bag, then put the bag on the table.  So finally
these people finish their stuff, and the woman goes to help them 
load the like 3 carts full of stuff.  Im just like.. "damnit..
ive got a $3 card.  Fucking get out of the way already.  So, while
sitting there tapping my foot i finally get to buy my card, and 
the woman tries to make chit-chat.  Im just like "please, just
shut up and ring the card.  I really didnt want to spend the hours
i could be watching howard stern sitting here talking to a waste
of existance like you."  So anyway, just another reason Wal*Mart

May 6th:  Ok, this was just SOOOOO wrong.  I was watching talk 
soup.  And, well.  Lets just say that the springer clip was just
tooooo wrong.  First off, theres this black guy wearing a g string
and wearing some sort of a black 'wild west' (not quite stetson)
hat.  he's got these gold chains on.  Then he's got these two
chicks fighting over him.  One is naked wearing a wedding veil
and the other one, the black dude (he called himself "Mr. Panama")
started pouring honey on her foot, on stage, and sucking it off.
Im just like... "WTF is this.. some really really really low rate
porn, transformed for cable television?" (with a lot less words and
a lot more explicitives).  I mean, each week they just try and
top the last with how WRONG they can make it.... ugh.  I need to
stop watching talk soup.  Badly.

May 5th:  Ah, its the anniversary of Cinco De Mayo.  Anniversary
as in at the time i am writing this, one year before... well,
lets just say it was one HELL of a time down in Mexico.  So,
what is there to complain about you say?  Well, lets start with
mexican food.  I love mexican food, but theres a new trend that
is starting to bother me.  Anyone out there ever have a "Santa
Fe" gordita from taco bell?  WTF is with putting corn in a
damned taco?  I mean, meat, cheese, sauce, lettuce.. all that
good stuff, but CORN?  I mean, did you just point at a food chart
and say "lets pick something to put in our generically named
tacos".  And, one time i made the mistake of letting my parents
order the food for me.  MISTAKE.  My mom's like, "here's your
gorditas.  I love santa fe!"  and im like "oh god please mom
say you didnt get me that corn crap".  Well, she did.  And it
sucked.  So, basically, the moral of the story:  Corn does not
= mexican food.  Lets get that straight.  Corn is for like, 
4th of july picnics, if anything.

May 4th:  I really hate blockbuster video.  Unfortunately, 
blockbuster owns like half of texas.  One thing that really 
pissed me off, is i went to rent "Deep Impact" and low and
behold, out of the like 200 copies, i just happen to grab
the ONE that was misplaced in there.  "Deep Rising".  I get
home and turn it on and i see this thing about "ships disappearing
under the sea" and im like "what the fuck?".  Well, you know,
maybe its some secret underground project designed to counteract
comets, right?  No.  I see this big bubbling "Deep Rising" and
just scream out "GOD DAMNIT".  So, of course, blockbuster is
closed.  I go back the next day and demand a real movie and they
are like "dude, thats like, against policy.  suck it."  And,
well, i wont even bother talking about the $4 per movie.  

May 3rd:  One of the most frusterating things is testing just
how hot something you want to eat is.  I mean, i really dont want
to sit and rub my fingers around in it, and even then, you take
one nice bite and some hot air pocket poofs and burns the crap
out of the top of your mouth.  And, the most annoying part is
that the burnt roof of your mouth stays that way for DAYS..
i mean, its not like some 'hey, i think ill have a pepsi and
then it will be fine,'  Oh no, its like a "my god i hate those
god damned hot pockets" for at least half a week.

May 2nd:  Ok, so i went to wal-mart tonight (yes, the EVIL 
empire HQ, my former place of "employment", the actual store)
to get star wars Ep I figures.  Well, first off, its always 
funny to go to a wal-mart 2 years later and see who is still
actually working there.  For the same like $6.50 per hour that
they got before.. and i saw like 4 people there i worked with.
It made me glad i decided to like, move up in the world.  if even
a little.  So, the real point was i was in the parking lot, and
they have this guy drive around in a little go-cart thing, then
stop, smoke a cigarette, and do it again.  Like he would actually
do anything if people started breaking into cars.  Theres all these
damned carts ALL over slamming into stuff, and he just like puts
along.  I think it is his actual job to move the carts, but damn,
its like some sort of commodore video game, dodging the carts,
even while walking without getting slammed into... damn Wal-Mart
and damn their evil empire of badness

May 1st:  Lets address coffee today.  We have free coffee at my
work, but theres a few problems.  1) At our desks we can only have
drinks with caps or lids.  2)  The lids provided for the coffee
are WAY too small.  You have to warp the cup and usually it breaks
the styrofoam and then the cup is worthless.  Because you KNOW
how bad styrofoam tastes when its "Protective Seal" is broken.
And then, if you dont drink your coffee in like 30 minutes because
the lids are all messed up, it goes stone cold.  And cold coffee
is one of the nastiest things there is out there... it just...
you know.  It sucks.  AND... the pepsi machine there doesnt have
bottles.  It has cans.  which we cant drink at my cube.  So, my
bottle choices are:  coke, which i dont drink.  dr. pepper, which
i also dont drink.  Or sprite.  So ive been drinking a lot of
sprite lately, and i dont especially like it.  

April 30th:  You know, i saw something that just pissed me off
today.  Theres a 'live action' Inspector Gadget movie.  I mean,
has the movie industry so run out of ideas that they have to
remake EVERY SINGLE somewhat successful cartoon?  I mean, one or
two was kinda funny, but we're talking every single summer there
is at least 2 or 3.  I mean, george of the jungle.. i still 
refuse to EVER watch that movie.  1) I hate brendan frasier,
and 2) it just looked SOOOOOOoooo bad.  And i am still in denial
that they made TWO brady bunch movies.  One made me chuckle, two
made me puke.

April 29th:  Its kind of funny after watching a lot of movies
and stuff, and being desensitized to all sorts of violence when
i watch to see just what they censor on tv movies today.  
Nudity and swearing i understand, but its kind of hilarious
at the types of violence they censor out.  In "Tombstone" 
where one of the main characters is shot, they cut out all of
his like, important 'goodbye' lines because he was "covered 
in blood".  I dont see them cutting that crap out of ER.  But
maybe thats because it wasnt everyone's favorite "i will never
ever ever make a movie that makes money' man George Clooney.
Its also funny when watching a USA up all night where they play
neo-pornography, cut out all the nudity, and expect people to
watch.  I mean, those movies are just so thick in plot that what
does a little lack of nudity mean?  Lets take "Marilyn Chambers
Bedtime Stories".  Well, to begin with its not a cinematic
masterpiece to watch a 15 years past her prime porn star act
like she is still attractive.  But to listen to her tell stories
about people getting laid and all you see is the restaurant
scenes where they talk about hair.  But then again, at 3am there
really isnt a lot of choices on what to watch on tv.  I mean,
theres only so many times i can watch Ron Popeil sell me his 
silly ronco items.

April 28th:  Wendy's drive thru screwed me today, but we just
wont go there.  On my way to work i got caught behind this 
woman with a 'jesus is in my car' bumpersticker.  Well Jesus
sure has put on some weight because she was putting along at
like 20mph on a 35mph road... so im sitting there, i miss the
long light, and then she goes the EXACT SAME WAY to work as
I did.  i mean i swear, i couldnt get her the hell out of 
the way.  I would have thought the obscene gestures and yelled
profanities might have tipped her off that she could get out
of first gear, but NOOOoooooo she just sort of drove along
in her little world and would NEVER GET OUT OF THE WAY..... 
argh.  Im like trying to nascar my way to work, and this woman
was just determined to screw me.  So if you see a "Jesus in my
car" bumper sticker, sideswipe her ass for good old rat.

April 27th:  I swear they screw you at the drive thru every
single time.  I ordered a combo meal, though i didnt really
want the drink, i wanted the curly fries (this is at arbys)
and so, what the hell.  might as well get a large drink for
like 40 cents, right?  Well, they sure as hell made sure that
wasnt going to happen.  they hand me my stuff, the drink, 
and close the window.  So, i put my straw in while i am on
my way home, and what does the delicious looking mountain
dew taste like?  FREAKING SELTZER!!!!!!  They obviously didnt
hear all the hissing noises the drink machine makes while they
were injecting their heroin and neglected to tell me i just
spent $6 for a chicken sandwich and fries.  because let me
tell you, that drink sure hit the trashcan pretty damned fast.
I used to really like arby's, but now its time for revenge.

December 2nd: Ever wondered what happened to the snapple empire?
Well, probably not.  But i havent seen that one 'snapple lady' in
a few years.. and the only new thing snapple has done in those 
years is change their labels.  I remember when there was like a
new snapple flavor every week... i dont know if "Frutopia" cut
into their profits.. but it is really pissing me off.  Snapple
brought about the entire 'everyone loves strawberry kiwi' 
revolution, and now it is floundering with putting 'all natural'
on its pink lemonade.  Get it together snapple!

December 1st: Well, Its back..! :)  Anyway, during my couple of
months off, there were a few complaints that didnt happen to get
on here.. hopefully i can remember most of them.  Anyway, today's
complaint is about this strange food called 'grits'.  I had never
heard of them except on maybe a dukes of hazzard episode or so, 
but QUAKER makes these instant grits in flavors like 'country 
bacon' and 'red eye gravy'... i had one, and basically, lets take
cream of wheat, and turn it into a lunch.  It was kind of pretty
gross, it was like eating sand with bacos.  Moral of the story:
grits are bad.